Day 300 – Daily expansion

img_0949I am starting a challenge – every day sharing.

Not just sharing, but to face a point and direct myself to change. No matter what little that point would be or if it’s insignificant. But the relevance is the consistent movement, direction and thus accumulation of self-trust and self-expansion.

I used to rather write less often but with bigger ‘chunks’ – usually meaning to fabricate a blog post within 1-3 sitting/days/nights.

One of my greatest challenge just might be consistency. I used to judge it as boring, robotic, mundane, and as usually with things a human individual resists the most – holds a key to a gift for oneself. Jut because judged people who I saw/defined/perceived as stuck within their daily robot program life without real enjoyment or awareness. So, I guess, I was worried that if I would form a habit, I would also become this robo-tala.

Well, to have a consistent job for more than just months always seemed extremely challenging, I did not even did it before started the Journey to Life blogging, self-forgiveness process. But with that, with this very blog – I started to find stability. And not to just avoid things/points/experiences I resist, but also to ask – Why? And to see if that’s self-honest or not.

I challenge myself to embrace consistency. Within my process I got to the point of obviously recognizing the ability to move through self-delusions and letting patterns go, stopping an addiction or to prove myself that any fear or resistance can be opened up, decomposed and understood with eventually letting go.

Motivation is key, I used to believe that it is something I get, I feel, I am being inspired with, however within self-creation I realized that I also can birth with principled living.

Many people, as myself believed that principles are limitations and it’s so easy to judge individuals who hold onto a principle, however I’ve realized that I also can create a principle what aligns with my self-honesty, with all life equally.

My principle is to find out what’s best for all participant of this existence, including myself and from the situation, location and condition I find myself within today, the practical common sense is to liberate myself from beliefs, fears and delusions with all available self-support tools at my disposal.

The best practical way is to write within self-honesty – about myself, but within introspection, reflection and investigative investigation of what I consist of and experience and within self-honesty to see if there is any polarity-based, self-interested aspect what could – and should – be re-evaluated and changed.

For instance suppressing myself within the belief that I should not make mistakes or I have to be the nice guy, or I have to act according to morality – or I should care about what others think of me, or I should need to prove that I am good enough, worthy and valuable. These examples are what are obviously self-limitations and thus it’s supportive to let these behavior patterns go.

Many find actual, real time change difficult, and with writing it’s doable. Write yourself to freedom.

Self-forgiveness is also holding a key to support awareness and preparation for change. With writing it, with sounding the words aloud – I take responsibility for what I have allowed and accepted but from now on I am not going to. I give for myself a change. Wonderful!

Anyone resists forgiving oneself for any mistake/limitation/fear/resistance I’d suggest to consider the following: there are so many, much more beyond our judgements/resistances/fears/resistances, but we have no idea, it’s completely unknown, undefined, uncharted territory.
If someone would just have a glimpse of what it is like to live without fear and resistances, within self-trust – that would really help to start moving.

It’s also possible to check out the ones already walking this process – their blogs and vlogs – just with curiosity, go back to someone’s first blog posts, video logs, and to see how they changed. With many individuals, who walk the Journey to Life blog writing since years the change will be astonishing.
Even myself, when I look back at my first vlog – I could barely speak up and express what’s inside within me and I had so many resistances to just even look inside of me. And today I am able to walk through mind-constructs and stop once and for all quite some addictions, phobias and to really start exploring the possibilities and to find out what the potentials are.

And although I am walking this process since some years – I see that my potential also can be much more if I would not stop moving, expanding, changing – but to accumulate that every day, regardless of the definition of the amount of time. Not just express every day, every hour, every minute, but always, unconditionally.

That is what I accumulate here. From weekly posting here towards daily posting. That’s a step.

I forgive myself that I have defined that my biggest challenge is consistency and to do something every day, and not realizing that I inflate this resistance to a much bigger thing in my mind than what actually it is and use judgments, expectation and comparison to stop expressing myself based on doubt and fear of not being good enough.

I forgive myself that I have not realized that I already have a bunch of things within my life what I do every day without problems, and those habits I’ve also created within myself and within that realizing that I can create structure without polarity and fear, and the key is not to just create it but to become, live it as who I am – and within blogging/vlogging every day – it’s not about time or having resources at all, but it’s about pushing through inner resistances.

I forgive myself that I have not realized that although often it’s great support to exactly name the patterns, word the issues within me, such as resistances, within self-direction it is also key to move and push myself through them, and if I am directive, it’s actually does not matter what is the resistance, but regardless – I move, direct, express. For instance resisting daily sharing – yes, it’s cool to recognize why I resist it, but in fact when it comes to share – it does not matter. I just share. And if I resist it, I stop for a moment, I breathe, and let it go and then move – and then do the share – write – make a video, record an audio and I trust myself.

I forgive myself that I have not realized that within fearing from making mistakes or not being good enough, I’ve stopped to express myself unconditionally within self-trust, and constantly sabotaging my expansion by comparing, judging, wanting to be better, and not realizing that there is only one condition – do I trust myself and live myself or not.

I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to use the excuse of grammar or visual quality for why I do not share something or defining that I only can share when it’s ‘quality’ and not realizing that self-realization is not about perceived quality but actual change.

It’s okay to have a typo, until the message is clear – it does not mean I should be sloppy or deliberately avoid discipline or clarity – but it means to trust myself that even if I’d make mistakes – I do not get stuck but I learn from them, get to know myself and keep expanding, even if applying a pattern every day, or to live consistency.

I also encourage everyone to write more, not about others, but to investigate, study and support oneself within expansion.

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