[JTL 124] Fantasy, mystical: letting go part 2

Continuing on Fantasy, Imagination as it is some sort of systematic.

When participating within fantasy, fairytale, a world of myths – the mind kicks in with a form of:

How real is the illusion?

The capacity to become obsessed with the imagination and adoring it’s beauty and adoring that beauty within it’s reflection within my mind.

And to adore the creation of this perfect illusion.

I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to adore the obsession about fantasy, imagination, illusion about how perfect it is and how anything detail is not pulling me back so I can just feel the feeling it’s perfection.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become obsessed with validating perfection within lost in the details of illusion and defining it as normal to judge a fantasy image, world, sound to determine is it cool to fly or is not.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that it is alright to enjoy a fantasy, an illusion, but to become obsessed with it, it’s image, it’s likeness while disregarding physical reality is self-dishonesty.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself do have knowledge and information about what is original fantasy and how it should look like and what entails within it and what not for instance a dwarf with axe yes but with a laser gun not and having tons of rules what illusionary being is within which fantasy world and reacting to the matching, error-finding as ‘perfectionism’ while only reacting to memory, comparing with thoughts and in fact it is subjective.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to always go into the details of fantasy and imagination in order to find errors, mistakes, odds to be able to say, it is not perfect so then I am perfect within my perfect knowledge meanwhile disregarding physical reality here.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have an analytical mind with which I can compartmentalize, categorize, segregate and judge, define, react to parts of my perception, regardless of it is real physical experience or imaginary as fantasy in my mind only or picture, screen.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to trust experience and knowledge instead of trusting myself always directly here.

I forgive myself that I have not realized that when I look at something and I think it as fantasy, I check my feeling reactions, do I have cool feeling or not and not realizing that it is automatic, based on my memory, previous reactions to similar things and my thoughts what will stimulate, suggest, direct me to react and within re-defining myself I will define this process as who I am.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to react in the mind to not be present here and define the undefined and then define my defining of undefined as who I am and completely miss the point here.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define adorable to observe fantasy what I’ve defined as perfect.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to adore creation of fantasy what I’ve defined as beautiful, perfect, nice based on my reactions, feelings.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to adore the persons who create fantasy what I’ve defined as perfect in my mind by not finding errors in it and matching my expectations about what is the proper, perfect kind of fantasy.

I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that fantasy is not real, only in the mind and it is alright to enjoy it as fantasy, but to disregard what is here, to escape from physical presence into fantasy is of fear, not self-honest, must be stopped.

I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that I can enjoy myself and express myself without any memory, any fantasy, any imagination but be here, in and as the physical.

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