So it’s like There are Episodes, Seasons.
These in general come week after week/month after month.
And Movies are not quite the hype in these days, but most of the people watch series.
More suspense, longer story, deeper character building, bigger tension.
And somehow they just happen to end an episode right after something very fascinating about what will happen in the next moment.
I’m kind of the guy who rather waits for a season to finish first and then watch them consecutively than wait for the story week by week/month by month – I want to direct the speed of walking through the story.
And when I am off sick or particularly I am alone at home, sometimes I am not directing myself watching these series but I am hooked on and simply disregard my priorities, even if it is tiredness, health issue or simply my commitments, work to be done.
And that is obviously what is being addressed, investigated and corrected within these writings here.
In the beginning I was watching series what seemed like secrets unfolding to learn for instance about micro expressions and that was fascinating but then I’ve realized, there are more dimensions within this devotion to TV series for me.
What is the separation I project out as missing from my life what I want to see on screen and why?
So the first one was Heroes – that fascinated me with a possible future scenario of mutant superheroes and it was cool and these normal guys just happened to have special abilities all of a sudden, what is all kids dream about: to just transform from this normal, average foe to a superhero – or super villain who is way above all others and basically can do anything, except when conflicting other superheros/villains.
That I’ve started when I was kid – I always felt myself different than the kids around – I was mostly thinking while they were playing around – I have seen this as an extended mental ability which through I could process much more information faster than them and by that I’ve felt myself superior within – however in the meantime I’ve felt myself separated, less effective with physical things, especially lack of muscle strength, so I’ve came up with the idea that my muscle is my mind, that is my weapon, that is my power.
This leaded to thinking more, much more and in a way it was maybe helpful with certain subjects but with most of it not at school – but I was very suppressive, nervous and anxious most of the time.
Especially when realized I was not in the interest of girls, regardless of being favorite of teachers – I just could not manage to grab girls or if I did – it was like a split second and I was unable to speak properly, I felt shame for the great desire towards them as subjects of my hunger for obtaining, wanting.
So this mentalist guys, the psionic, the very smart people who were played well meanwhile being super smart always got my attention – especially those kind of role models in movies, TV series.
And these TV series have their own story, and by that story they unfold new aspects of their life of superpowers what fascinated me.
Also this STORY what intrigues me, like I want to know the END of it, what will be like, and who will WIN, what will be the perspective beyond the last episode – or is there any last episode?
I mean lots of successful series are continuing and just rolling forward and the story is being created throughout the seasons and their only interest is to compel the people to watch the next episode as well.
Because then their work becomes more important, they can get more view, meaning more episodes the Studio get financialized, meaning the Film Crew can get more JOB, days to work on and they can WORK on and on and on meanwhile in fact they enjoy themselves, living in a specific kind of DREAM world, they earn MONEY for it and even better, fans love them, adore them, totemize them, they seem like real heroes in their eyes.
This also happens with movies, but only with the most successful ones, the rest are just popcorn ballast, after a hard, shitty workday, people just buy the ticket, have some action flick wherein some ass is being kicked in a cool way with some groovy sentences exchanged, car chases, explosions and cute faces, great tits and then move along.
When I was kid I watched TV series, kind of liked the story going on, it was this curiosity what drove me to watch the next one – and many times TV series do not work out all the details just like Movies – for instance a bank robbery, many times they just symbolize it, and it is enough – of course the big, cool ones are working the effects out perfectly, but they not necessarily have to.
The personalities, characters, the interactions, the credibility, the BEAT(change) within people what was always interesting for me – how they will get along with the situation, whatever it is – superhuman abilities, alien invasion or just solving a murder case by watching facial expressions.
Many angles this opens up and it is in handshake with cinema/movies – but the TV series are like long term relationships while movies are like one night stands – so movies has to be more perfect and more flickering and more unusual – even in the color they look like surreal in these days – extremely wide angle, oversaturated colors etc but in the TV – it can be normal – just to be a bit more interesting than our normal life – facing daily life stuff what with we can relate – and then facing unusual stuff – or who knows – I’ve never been in those romantic series but that might just happen without any unusual stuff – just the WAY they show it, they arrange it, they choose the words what they say, the camera how approaches the events, the music/score/sound effects how they art it together – it is just like fascinating.
Especially when we hear in the news about catastrophes, govt scandals, extinction, famine and war every day – we just want to be ENTERTAINed, right?
Well, there are some angles in relation to my experiences towards TV/movies what I will share here to support and assist myself and others within Self-honesty to change my Series/Movies watching from Reactive to Directive in terms of I am remaining in the center of my beingness as presence in breath meanwhile what the Series/Movies bring up in me I can walk through as Mind-reaction within Self-honesty.
What is also my direction here is to not become overwhelmed with the Series/Movies – meaning not allowing to ruin my priorities by ‘alright, just watching one more episode, as it is so interesting at this point’ – by realizing: ‘Well, it will just intensify until the end of the Season’ – and many times they ‘close’ a Season with bringing up much more questions to make people strive and demand for the next Season to see those questions answered and unfold the story more and more and see how this will end.
Typical example is Lost – when it came out many people watched it and I resisted just because if so many people watch it, I certainly don’t – and after watching Fringe through what I liked – I was curious about the maker’s other works so I tried Lost, but what people told about it was like not so cool:
-Well, it is cool in the first, maybe second Season but from that it is just more and more weird and crazy and nonsensical.
Of course it was nonsense, I was living in jungle, I had taste of real nature and surviving and I grew up near to nature in village, made my own food, fed animals etc – girls with make up, guys with shaved face/chest and fat dude remains fat and they never do normal stuff like toilet or wash clothes only run around with great tension – obviously not real – but the story they pointed the attention to was fascinating for me.
So I watched through some time ago and I understood it quite well and made sense for me.
In the first season there were no answers, not even in the second, third really but then it can make some sense – but for real solution, understanding, resolution – one had to watch through almost to the end, the 6th Season where then it made sense – at least for me.
But it is the same with the mind: one can just observe the reactions, experiences, feelings, but has to see beyond to start questioning.
Then one can start notice the thoughts, backchat, the reactions, the conditions
After that one has to question how and why a certain reaction comes and then can wonder about how to stop it practically.
And after that when starts to stop the automatic program within – starts to really understand what is what one is facing when resistances come, when automatic reactions come so fast that one must investigate further.
Further and further when the whole construct is here – through it’s relationships and word-connections, memories, feelings, thought-patterns – all is here – and one is able to stand at the middle within silence and say: STOP and actually stop – and remain stopped and see what is beyond the stopping.
What is the reason of that particular automatic mind-pattern, what was it’s origin, it’s reason, purpose and what another thing one can discover beyond that.
So then it is also like a Series, there as Seasons within Self-honesty and more and more questions will come and more and more will be unfolded and seen, realized, understood.
But one must have to be practical – still go to work if required, still eat, sleep, clear dishes as it can not be done in a long weekend.
Also the tendency for me when I realize about a pattern that it is consuming too much energy: TIME – then I try to push it, and putting more energy and time into it to ‘FINISH’ it – computer games I had this to play through, and also when my relationship with my partner did not work – I pushed more and more time and energy into it and eventually I was quite obsessed with it and nothing else I did not care about within the belief, hope and interest of ‘sorting it out once and for all and then I will be in peace’.
Also when I smoked – oh shit I’ve been smoking MJ so much, just doing it 24/7 – I should just smoke it all tonight so then tomorrow I will not smoke it because I won’t have.
But the problem was that who I defined, constructed, manifested myself to be as physical human being within interaction it’s environment with others, things – that I did not change – the starting point I did not change, so then when I did not have ‘entertainment’ as Series or ‘drug’ to push – I automatically created the same circumstances again: even when I decided not to start a series or buy drug – somehow I had stuff, somehow I’ve seen an episode from something and then I was on the ride again – and then just rushing to it’s end and even not really enjoying it because seeing meanwhile that it takes so much time and that I do not really have.
So it’s a hamster wheel if one allows it to become especially combining smoking with series – definitely requires some Self-support to stand within Self-direction based on Principle.
It’s all about the patterns one allows self to behave, act, interact with-in self, with- out others.
Especially when considering not only Self-interest, but ALL LIFE Interest, being able to not just think, feel according to the goodness of others as well, but actually, REALLY be able to ACT according to WHAT IS BEST FOR ALL – in the economic, political, educational realm of our society.
So all can be reflected back to the question as: WHO I AM? In and as this very life I am being busy here on Earth – and what will remain when I will be gone – and certainly will be gone – only the fool can not comprehend that – so be able to understand that what will remain is the PHYSICAL reality – then one can consider COMMON SENSE and FACTS to work with and support all the children to come who are open, innocent, living beings just as we started here equally.
That equality must be realized, respected and lived so whatever is the pattern within us what do not support to act according to that practical equality – must be sorted out with the tools of Self-support, such as Writing, Self-forgiveness, Self-correction…
That can be started with the DIP LITE course, which is a great way to start exploring what requires to stop the patterns what do not support us, others.
To be continued with Self-forgiveness statements to become aware of the patterns of Self-dishonesty
Meantime I suggest to check out