release rely ease for giveness

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to program myself to breath in the ‘background’ – not realizing that by suppressing the breath – I suppress myself who I am as life.
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to explore practical solution by finding excuses to not stand up immediately.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use financial situation as an excuse to not stand up for myself and stopping the inner reactions.
I forgive myself that I have accepted myself as pain.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to for myself according to pain or in order to avoid pain.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define non physical pain within myself within and as the mind by defining myself unbearable or too intense.
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that everything is here as me and what I do not direct here as me – I allow separation.
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to push myself in every single moment to stop the dishonesty as me.
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize the simplicity of the stopping of me as mind consciousness system because not being aware of what is here.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use human physical body as a vessel, a machine for my mind as I’ve allowed myself to define myself as the mind and consciousness.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to desire for sex
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to desire for sex to have release and satisfaction – instead of exploring how and why I separate myself from these words and their’ meanings and also by realizing these meanings and how and why I’ve defined these in order to ‘create’ separation within and as me here in the physical.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to suppress my systems to a certain degree when these systems are taking over me and then I am being absolutely directed, almost being possessed and then I am slowly realizing that what I am doing is not who I am and I have to stop and then I stop.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to suppress the masturbation demon within me and by suppressing it – defining it as energy and then being obsessed to avoid sexual expression and then it simply explodes and I am not here as directive principle for moments while the energetic release is experienced.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to program myself to being aroused by pictures and sounds of women or people having sex.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use sexual arousement as an attention divertion from me from here.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear from experiencing full sexual self expression and then wanting to stop it or wanting to release it — instead of being here and being self and being expression.
i forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear being with a woman because then it could happen that she would be obsessed with me or I would be obsessed with her – because in the past I had these experiences – it can only reoccur if I do so.
I forgive myaself that I have allowed myself to escape from me as self expressionb because I’ve judged myself before I would allowed myself to even experience myself.
I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to fear from being exposed by others as mind system demon – instead of taking self-responsibility and sharing what I’ve allowed myself to become and assisting and supporting me and others by be the living example of stopping me as mind consciousness system and express life.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to divert my attention from me as presence as breath as body expression to specific situations what come by while I am moving within and as 3d physical. For instance meeting with someone or talking with someone – or being specifically busy with something such as making a tea or typing words or commands.

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