Self forgiveness on self-interest

At the moment what reveals

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become interested in a woman to become obsessed with one being to exclude all others.
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to live as the living expression as principle as all as one as equal as life.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to desire someone only to have sex to release the emotional suppressed self-shit for a moment to not change but looping it over and over and over again – instead or realizing that to stop generate this emotions trough thoughts is the common sense and the shortest way, always here.
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that when I build up desire for a woman – it is based on sexual desire what is based on preprogrammed reactions to pictures.
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that my interest in a woman is only related to my sexual desire what is related to the release of compounded suppressions.
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that when I released this emotional shit with orgasm with the girl, instanteniously I want to go away because only this what I wanted and this is quite a self-interest stuff.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hide this within me to start to desire women who I judged as extremely attractive/beautiful to simply being able to judge them right after the orgasm to form a bind very soon to not facing with this accepted and allowed nature of myself – but this is also a point of self-interest, based on perceived pictures are compared from my memory what is well preprogrammed.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to obey to my thoughts.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that my thoughts have right.

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